Intimacy and Challenges

Yesterday, we were blessed with the opportunity to hear Heidi Baker, founder of Iris Ministries, speak here on our Kona campus. Her words moved me, challenged me, and inspired me. Today, I have taken some time to process what she taught and what God spoke to me yesterday. I think the reason Heidi has such a way of drawing people in is her level of intimacy with Jesus. She has suffered and struggled as a missionary for over 30 years, yet she is so full of life and joy and has seen so many miracles.

I long for that closeness with Jesus in my life. I realize there are 2 things really holding me back; a FEAR of man and a FEAR of suffering. These are 2 fears I find very challenging to break through. On the outside, I say I do want to suffer for you Jesus! But, on the inside, that scares me. I’ve been fairly comfortable my whole life. I look back, and I don’t think I’ve had to endure too much suffering. But I look at the life of Jesus, while He was here on this earth. He endured so much!! And it was for you and for me. And I know I waste time worrying what people think. This is a frustrating one for me.  When I can conquer these fears is when I will break barriers holding me back from becoming closer with my God who wants to be close to me. I know I can’t do it in my own strength; I’m thankful to be a daughter of the King, the king of all kings who will walk beside me and be my help.

I encourage you to pray over areas in your life that may be holding you back from a closer intimacy with Jesus. And please pray for me. I’ve asked God to challenge me in these 2 areas of fear, and I expect Him to answer, what an exciting time to look forward to!

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs–heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. Romans 8:15-18 (NIV)

What I’m listening to today:

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One thought on “Intimacy and Challenges

  1. Aubrey, you continue to amaze me with your writings.. You are a very deep thinker and a very good writer.. Your nana is so very proud of you and you are in my prayers continually.. love you, nana

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